Toxic People at Work? Been There, Done That!

I will never talk about this enough, I think no matter where we work, there’s always that one person (or a few) who seems to thrive on drama, gossip, or just making others feel like less, as if their job isn’t enough to keep them busy. You know the type—the one who pretends to be your friend, but talks shit behind your back.

I’ve been there. For a while, it was exhausting, constantly battling with my own self-esteem. But here’s the thing: most of the time, it’s not about us — it’s about them. And once I realized that, everything changed. I stopped caring anymore.

The Trust Dilemma

We all dream of living a simple life – go to work, earn enough to take care of our cat at home, and call it a day. But instead, we end up dealing with miserable people who have nothing better to do than talk about us.

On the worst days, these kinds of people really got under our skin. They mess with our sense of trust, as if we can’t rely on anyone ever.

On a flip side, it’s a reality check that’s necessary, even if it stings. Work relationships are built on convenience, not loyalty. People are often looking out for themselves, and that’s okay.

It’s okay to keep our guard up and protect ourselves. It’s okay to be super self-aware and reconsider every judgement you’ll make, even the friendliest person can hide a knife under their sleeves.

The Freedom of Not Caring

It wasn’t easy at first. I had moments where I overthought everything, replaying conversations in my head or worrying if people saw me the way these toxic individuals tried to paint me. But one day, I decided, “Whatever...”

Or as Taylor Swift perfectly puts it in Shake It Off, “Haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate.”
And honestly, she’s right. People are always going to have something to say, especially if you’re doing your thing and staying true to yourself.

How to Deal with It?

Here’s what helped me:

1. Detach Emotionally
   You don’t owe them your peace of mind. Toxic people thrive on reactions, so stop giving them one. Be kind, stay professional, and don’t let them see they’ve gotten under your skin.
2. Focus on Your Circle
   Surround yourself with supportive colleagues and friends. The energy you give and take matters more than you think.
3. Be Selective with Trust
   Not everyone is your friend, and that’s okay. Take your time to observe and only trust those who’ve consistently shown they deserve it. It’s better to be cautious than to feel betrayed.
4. Know Your Worth
   You’re at your job because you earned it. As Maya Angelou once said,
   “You alone are enough. You have nothing to prove to anybody.”
   Keep being yourself because that’s what got you there in the first place. So, stop trying to prove your worth to people who don’t even respect you because it’s simply a reflection of their incompetence and low integrity, not yours.
5. Let Go
   If they want to twist your words or spread negativity, let them. At the end of the day, you can’t control what others say — but you can control how much space you let them take up in your life.

Keep Growing

Looking back, I’m actually thankful for those experiences. They forced me to grow, to set boundaries, and to truly stop caring about things that don’t matter.

But I’m also learning how to rebuild trust in a healthy, measured way. If you’re dealing with toxic colleagues right now, know this: it’s temporary, and it’s not your responsibility to fix them. Focus on your goals, your growth, and the people who genuinely have your back.

Because as Billie Eilish once said, “If you like me, cool. If you don’t, bye.”

And honestly? That’s the energy we all need.
Remember, people throw rocks at things that shine ;)

With love,
R